Glee Actually spoilers

[babydraco]

Okay Glee. That was like a first draft of a poorly executed fanfic.

A #1 Problem: Coach Bieste tells Sam and Brittany that there is no Mayan Apocalypse because "the Mayans were wiped out by the conquistadors". This is a person who works in a school. The Mayans were not wiped out by anyone! The Mayan people are all over South America. For some reason, a lot of North American schools have traditional taught that the Mayans "disappeared for mysterious reasons".

As Demian rightly rightly points out, Brittany gave Marley a $25,000 watch, yet Marley not only doesn’t mention this to her mother, she acts like it never happened at all. With this watch, they could pay for her therapy, buy new clothes, pay some bills, get her mom on Weight Watchers, whatever, it’s $25,000. Sue only gave them $800, which is enough for 4 sessions, so Marley better be cured in four weeks or else that’s it for Marley’s therapy. Btw, you’re telling me that people so poor they can’t, between the two of them, one of them a minor, scrape together an initial $200 despite one of them being in full time employment, are not on Medicaid? What’s the Medicaid sitch in Ohio anyway? Not like this show does research though…

Brittany cleared out her savings because of the apocalypse. Apparently, Brittany has enough money in her "savings" to buy a $25,000 watch, a new model car, an expensive vacation, etc. Where did she get all this money? She doesn't even have a job as far as we know. No teenager going to a Lima public school has more than $25,000 in savings, even a super wealthy kid wouldn't be allowed to access all that money instantly for no legitimate reason, their financial advisers wouldn't allow it.

If Rory is playing the part of the angel in Artie’s alternate timeline dream, does that mean Rory is dead? Why is Rory dead? This is Artie’s dream, so what makes Artie assume that Rory is no longer alive in that timeline? Or is Rory a powerful wizard or channel for the spirit world, who can not only jump timelines but knows what happens in most of them? I know, I know, it’s a dream world to begin with but why would Artie’s subconscious mind specifically choose Rory as its magical messenger? And if you're going to bring Damian back, why didn't he sing? He can't act, he can't dance, but he can certainly sing.

In “Love Actually”, all the plots eventually do come together, first at the Christmas play and then at the airport. In this homage to it on Glee, nothing really does. It’s just a bunch of plots haphazardly stuck together that never entirely pay off. Maybe everyone just didn't get the joke?

The entire dream sequence makes Artie out to be far more important to the club than he really ever was. It was Rachel who got Sandy Ryerson fired so Will could take over. It was Rachel who crowned herself chief soloist and president and then proceeded to totally live up to that responsibility. Rachel took the lead. Rachel kept their spirits up. Rachel had ideas. Rachel was the glue. And in no universe would Rachel ever give up singing just because Glee Club didn’t work out. Artie has a mighty high opinion of himself.

In Artie’s dream, Becky turns into the school slut because Artie “wasn’t there to teach her self worth” or something. Vomit. Becky gleefully tells him “I can’t get pregnant!”. While males with Down Syndrome are almost always infertile, Down Syndrome women can get pregnant. It’s more difficult than it is for other women, and there’s more potential for miscarriage, but it’s certainly possible. In fact, there have been controversies all over the world for decades over whether they should be given birth control or kept away from dating and marriage because they can have children but may not be able to raise them (and said babies might also have Down Syndrome). If Becky can’t get pregnant, then Becky might’ve been sterilized and that’s…an interesting choice for comedy.

It takes an episode actually being directed by a Jewish person to get an acknowledgement that Chanukah exists?

Why is Puck trying to be a screenwriter when he’s a very talented musician? Why is he coming back to Lima after barely trying in LA? What a way to ruin his storyline.

So Kurt didn’t graduate because of the bullying? Then why did he come back to the very school that failed him so badly? Why wasn’t he homeschooled? Why didn’t he take the GED? He wants to be a performer- they don’t ask for proof of high school graduation on Broadway. Or if your dad owns a successful garage where you can answer phones for awhile until you find yourself.

Sam appears to be losing his grip on reality. Brittany was always stupid, and slow, and gullible, but Sam had average cognitive abilities in the last two seasons. Now his intelligence has devolved to Brittany’s level. Not that it isn’t really funny, it IS funny, it’s just inconsistent and weird.